Lily is a flower (and also a kick-ass best friend)

Yesterday was my best friend Lily's birthday, and I thought I'd celebrate by writing a blog entry about her and why she's so awesome. Lils and I met through a random act of fate (I suppose most meetings are, yes?) and to this day, I think it is one of the kindest strokes of luck fate has dealt me.


On the first day of my undergrad, I arrived in Ottawa nervous as all hell. I lived my whole life prior to 19 in a tiny town, in the same house that I came home from the hospital to. My parents still live there. Unlike most of the people I knew who chose to go to schools in Guelph, Waterloo, or Toronto, (all less than 3 hours from home) I chose to go to Carleton for the Bachelor of Public Affairs and Policy Management. I knew no one there. In my graduating class of 350, I was the only person to choose Carleton, and one of two to choose Ottawa in general. I had no family there. I was shaking in my boots. Not to mention the daunting prospect of being placed in a shared room with a total stranger. This is what I mean about random acts of fate. Because, as you might have guessed, the total stranger I was placed with was the amazing Miss Lily.

Lily and I became very fast friends, frequently amazed by our eerie similarities. The pic on the left was taken on a random night in res (note this a scanned photo from the days prior to digital! Long time ago now) when we decided we were bored so a bunch of us did random things to our hair. Yep. Sometimes, that was what we did for fun. Lils and I shared many things, our program of study, our horrific capacity to create a mess, our love of musical theatre, disdain of ignorance, love of animals, adoration of planning, the list goes on and on. Once, the night before an econ exam, neither of us could sleep, and we stayed up past four am singing musicals from our separate beds. I can't imagine behaving this way with anyone else on the planet.

First year was a wild ride of stress and tears and laughter and partying. An early bedtime was 2:00am, more common was 3:00am. Once bed time did roll around, Lily and I spent every night talking each other to sleep. One person or the other would eventually fall asleep (it was never consistent who), though there was never offense taken. That was inevitable. For a year, Lily and I became an inseparable unit. There was no, "is Ashley coming to dinner? Is Lily coming to dinner?" It was always "are AshelyandLily coming to dinner?" It was like our name had become one. The last day of res, when I was going to return my keys, Lily followed behind me like a puppy while both of us cried. The idea of going back to falling asleep alone in our parent's houses two and half hours apart was daunting indeed.

Things changed, as things are apt to do. Circumstances and fate nearly worked to tear Lily and I apart entirely, and they almost succeded. I won't delve into that part of the story here, I don't like it very much. But, our friendship was too rare and amazing to not fight for. It survived the end of our undergrad, and an entire year apart when Lily went to teach in Japan, and I went to teach in Korea (yes, these countries are close together, and yes, we could have visited, but fate was working against us then, too).

I went to Queen's to do my Masters, then Lily followed the next year. Lily is such a good friend that she even made sacrifices like going to the football game at homecoming, because she knew that I loved it and was so sad that I missed it the year before. She told me that she couldn't get tickets, then surprised me with tickets when I arrived. She went and cheered happily, despite the fact that it was raining and she didn't like football or rain. See? Awesome friend.

Lily and I haven't lived in the same city for the last several years. Not since we finished our undergrad, in fact. It pains us both that we don't get to hang out all the time, but when we do, nothing has changed. We still share the same (sometimes bizarre) lexicon, we still mock each other with scathing adoration, we have a deeply amusing shared sense of humour that no one around us can possibly understand. We're neurotic planners and both love that the other is the same in that regard (case in point, in the above right picture, Lily is holding a cup. This was at Queen's homecoming. There was no open alcohol allowed past the check point, so in my planning preparations, I brought in my purse a 26er of rum, a litre of coke, two cups and some limes. Planning brings more fun times!)

Most importantly, though, is that between us there is a shared, deep and trusting love. We've seen each other at our very worst, and we're still best friends. We know what its like to lose that friendship, because we did once, and so whenever issues exist between us, we discuss them like grown-ups. I guess because we are, now (welcome to 28 doll!). I've often joked that Lily is the person I'd like on my side in a debate or a knife fight, because in both regards, she'll defend me fiercely. At the end of the day, those are the people you want in your life.

So, in conclusion, I'd just like to say, Happy Birthday Miss Lily! My life has been greatly enriched by the last nine years of friendship, and I look forward to many more years of your scathing wit and creepy ability to read my mind. Get out of my head woman! XXOO